A Hairy, Scary, Bizarre Giveaway

Posted: January 18, 2013 in Creatures, fiction, horror, reviews, Short stories and collections
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Today is a trifecta here on fuonlyknew! I will be reviewing three books by Troy Aaron Ratliff. And that’s not all. Troy is offering PDF copies of all three of his stories for a giveaway. There will be two lucky winners! Read on to join the fun.

I’m going to start by telling you about The Uninvited Guest.

The Uninvited Guest

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Looks can be deceiving as is the cover  for Uninvited Guest.

It was supposed to be a celebration. Good times for all. A wedding and new beginnings.

Harlan is crashing the party, kind of. Jose’s mother insisted he go to the wedding and when he asks Harlan to go, he figures why not. There’ll be free food and booze and maybe some babes to dance with.

It seems like it takes forever to get there. The wedding is being held in a lodge surrounded by dense woods.

Finally, they arrive. The wedding goes off without a hitch. Now it’s time to eat, drink, and be merry. Except it’s taking forever to get to the dancing.

Finally the music starts and the happy couple do the traditional bride and groom shuffle. Everyone is oohing and aahing, taking copious pictures and video.

Harlan, standing at the back of the gathering, happens to glance out one of the windows. Everyone else is watching the happy couple, but something made him look.

Something outside, maybe a shadow, slid along the windowsill.  No, not a shadow, it had bulk. It seemed to take a long time to pass.

The windows are spaced about 5 to 6 feet apart. In the time it took to glance to the next window, it was sliding past that one too!

Everyone is still watching the couple. Harlan feels frozen in time. A look at the doors shows they’re still standing wide open.

An overwhelming feeling of dread passes over him. Something is coming. It’s almost to the doors.

The author wrote this story from Harlan’s point of view. It worked really good. I experienced everything with Harlan, felt his confusion, dread, and disbelief. And then his terror.

Have you ever had that feeling like something really bad is going to happen? That’s how I felt, right along with Harlan.

Harlan may have been an uninvited guest, but he’s not the only one.

This gets a Five from me!

       

Don’t leave yet. I’ve also reviewed Just Past the Trees.

Read on to find out more and to enter the giveaway.

Just Past the Trees

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I liked this one. It’s got a couple of writers in it.

I’m a young guy, still live at home. Yeah, I know, get a life. But I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do.

I know I want to be a writer, have for as long as I can remember.

I’ve always felt writing is my strongest suit. I hope you agree. Story ideas can walk into my head like strangers at Thanksgiving, and before I know it, I’m fleshing out characters, plotting some pretty evil schemes for them to fall into, and hearing lines of prose…

But until I become famous, got to earn a living. I work for a company that repairs big rigs. I’m the runner. If they need a part of a tool, it’s my job to get it. Not glamorous, but it’s a living.

One of my jobs is keeping the property mowed.

During a Florida summer breathing makes you sweat.

You’d think I was certifiable, cutting the grass with an old push mower in the blazing afternoon heat. It’s a huge piece of property and takes all week. By the time I’m done, it’s time to start all over again.

“Job security” is what my dad calls it. “Perpetual motion through redundancy” is what I call it..

Anyway, that’s how I discovered the body, or what was left of it.

Like I said , it has two writers in the story. The other one is Doug Robbins. He’s a crypto-zoologist traveling through Florida on the trail of the Skunk-Ape. Ever heard of it? It’s the southern version of Bigfoot.

After hearing about the dead body, Doug suspects the skunk-ape may be involved. He’s here to finally get proof it exists and hopes to write a book about it.

The two young men hatch a plan to get said evidence of its existence and that’s when it gets hairy! Pardon the pun.

Troy can condense a story and make it have such an impact. I felt like I knew these guys. And a story about writers, the struggles they go through and how far they’ll go to write that story is interesting and fun. You get two different views from two writers.

Visually written. You’ll feel like you’re there, looking into the woods, and wondering what may be looking back at you.

Nothing less than Five Stars will do!

       

I also post reviews on aknifeandaquill.

Here is my review of Little Bernie’s Map.

Here I am doing one of my favorite things, reading and reviewing another short story. Man, I love doing these, and have I got a good one today.

Little Bernie's Map

This was just supposed to be a nice, relaxing family trip. A way to escape the daily grind and forget, for a while, the problems and worries at home.

Daniel and Gina, along with their son Bernie, are heading home after a trip to Disney World.  Daniel just lost his job, but they decide to go on this vacation anyway. It may be the last one they can take for a long time.

Bernie and his father have a game they play. Bernie loves map, he collects them. At random points in their trip, Daniel would ask Bernie how much farther they had to go and he would look on the map to track their progress.

Bernie had one map that was special. A map given to him by an old woman when they stopped for a break at the Florida Welcome Center. She told him to be careful with it and Bernie tried to be.

But when weird and frightening things start to happen, the map is not first on any of their minds. All they can think about is what just happened.

What came down from the sky that day would be discussed for years to come. Each person would draw their own conclusions. One thing most agreed on was what they saw, what it looked like.

My Thoughts

It has been a long time since I have been this surprised by a story. I had to reread several scenes just to wrap my mind around what was happening. I wanted to try to form an image in my head. I sure wish this had been a movie. You’ll know what I mean when” The Flashpoint” happens.

Troy has a wonderful way of leading you into the story. There is much about this family that you can relate to. The characters are genuine and very likeable. I felt their anguish and their perseverance and really wanted things to be alright for them.

When the event happens I am stunned. I can’t wait for you to read it. It is so wild and kind of funny. It definitely makes you think. Think and say, yeah, I hear ya.

If you like Twilight Zone and Tales From the Darkside, you will love this. I also got a flash of that dread you feel in the scene from the movie The Mist by Stephen King. The one where they are driving into the mist and you just know something inexplicable is going to occur. The feeling lasts long after you finish reading.

       

From Troy

If you are looking for a story behind the story, I can’t honestly recall what sparked the idea for Little Bernie’s Map all those years ago when I originally wrote it. Although I can say that after hearing about the disheartening news about the debt crisis, along with the various problems many people in the Rust Belt were experiencing – a personal hit for me since I’m from southwestern Ohio – a terrifying thought started eating at the back of my mind: What if I was in one of those situations? What if I had a family to feed and I was out of work? It’;s scary, and my heart truly does go out to those families. Of course, this was around the time that I found Little Bernie’s Map(originally conceived as Little Ian’s Map for those who care) in my writing desk. Naturally, the cogs and gears started turning like they do when I start thinking about the serious issues in the world and how I would express my feelings toward them. In other words, when guys like me consider the money problems of the world, we consider how we would react to a giant mutant….(left blank by me so as not to avoid spoiler). Then again, maybe that’s just me and why I’m not running the show.

Image of Troy Aaron Ratliff

Giveaway

Two lucky people will win PDFs of all three of these books!

Entry is easy.

Please leave your email address and answer this question, “When was the last time you were in the woods and what’s the weirdest/funniest/ best thing that happened to you there?”

Not required, but if you follow my blog by email, I’d love to keep you informed about all of the great books I discover.

Thank you and Good Luck!

About Troy Aaron Ratliff

Troy Aaron Ratliff was born and raised in Hamilton, Ohio and self-educated in writing, art and voice impersonations. When he’s not reading, writing and cooking up his next monstrosity, you can generally find him defending the galaxy from the forces of evil, feeding hippopotamuses, dining with foreign dignitaries and Zen masters, waking up to his supermodel wife, altering the space-time inter-dimensional warp or, more than likely, stuck in traffic somewhere in Southern California.

Website

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Click to buy the books.

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Comments
  1. Sherry says:

    You make these books sound so good, Laura. I know how much you love the short stories. I thought your reviews were very intriguing and they definitely make me want to read all three of them. Toss my hat in the ring please.

  2. Mallory Heart Reviews says:

    These are fantastic! Straight to my Goodreads to-read list! Let’s see, I probably haven’t been in the woods since 1974-oh yeah 1995 went hiking, slipped, landed totally upside down feet in the air, couldn’t right myself. But after those SCARY forest photos you posted, I’ll never go near the woods ever again (and I don’t mean the Sasquatch one, either.)

  3. Johnni says:

    I was in the redwood national forrest this past August. I saw a faerie.

  4. Kari hakkers says:

    Not since I was a kid -we heard noises and ran like heck!

  5. Kari hakkers says:

    I think your page looks awesome! I like your style 🙂

  6. Kylie Scott says:

    Hi! First off, Thank you for the invite to this giveaway. These books sound awesome.
    I haven’t been to the woods or bush as it’s called in NZ since i was in my early teen’s. My parent’s would take us up bush for Christmas. It was so exciting, every year i remember been so worried that Santa wouldn’t be able to find our tent, and would the possums pinch his cookies & beer, and eat the scroggen we left for his deer. Christmas morning was always so amazing, we would eat our breakfast watching the sun come up over the tree tops, watched as it broke through the flow laying clouds and then we would get to open our gifts from Santa. It was rather magical and it is something in time i would like to share with my young.

    • Andrea Hunt says:

      One of the last times I was in the woods I had my grandson with me and we were horseback riding. I detest snakes, so of course one decided to slither past my horse, which he saw, and freaked! I ended up less than 6 inches from the coiled snake. I knew to remain quite and was praying that the snake would just uncoil and go away. Imagine my surprise when my 9 yr old grandson dismounted, grabbed a forked stick, and removed the snake! Thankfully it was just a rat snake, but when you are that close to a snake your life passes before your eyes!

    • fuonlyknew says:

      What a wonderful experience. You need to carry on this tradition:)

  7. Andrea Hunt says:

    All of your books look wonderful. I’ll be glad to review them for you also. I do reviews for Daniel Silva, Dean Koontz, James Rollins, Toby Tate, Ryan Winfield, and several others. I post the reviews on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and GoodReads. If it’s a new book I post at 12:01 am on the morning of the book’s public release. Let me know if I can be of any assistance to you! Best wishes and thanks for the chance to win your books. I’ll buy them if I don’t win, though!

    • I love Dean Koontz, he’s my favourite author (apart from me lol) although most of my reading is now from the self-publishing pool. Not only can I help other struggling authors by reviewing, but also I find so many different and delightful reads. I’m not saying they’re all great but for the most part I love the ‘difference’. It’s great that you review too.

    • fuonlyknew says:

      Very generous offer! I’m sure Troy will be pleased.

  8. I can’t remember the last time I was in the woods, but I do remember that I saw a mother deer with her fawn once. It was so adorable.

    lakeyg@yahoo.com

  9. ellamedler says:

    I promised myself I wouldn’t pick up any more new books until I review a few of those cluttering my kindle. But it’s so tempting! Can’t… resist… any… longer…

    Ahhhhh!

    Last time I walked through the woods was a few months ago. The constant rain has changed the way I spend my days off, of late. My collie and his big brother, the Bernese, skipped through the leafmold and over fallen branches, the collie always in a rush to nowhere in particular, and the Bernese following his nose like the master hunter he always thought himself to be. All of a sudden, a squirrel shot out of a pile of leaves, bolted to the nearest tree, and disappeared into the canopy. The poor Bernese was so shocked, he fell on his back side and squeaked in fright. Big baby!

  10. Thanks for the giveaway – although my reading list is vast, I can never resist adding more.

    The last time I was in the woods was through my story, Knowing Jack. It was a few days before Christmas and Jack and his cousin, Rosie were not only lost, but being chased by ‘a big bloke from the white van’. Rosie was forever crying and moaning and demanding and Jack desperately looked for a way home for them both. The woods were dark and cold and seemed never ending, set within a wilderness of the snow-filled landscape. Jack, however, has ‘those feelings’, ones that he doesn’t really understand but doesn’t ignore – but do they help in the rescue?

    🙂

  11. Marianne Houghtaling says:

    Last time I was in the woods, I was hiking and was crossing a stream when one of the rocks underneath me shifted and I went flying into the water. That was pretty scary but it could have been worse because thankfully I wasn’t alone and with help was able to make the hike back to the car.

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  13. Beckey says:

    “When was the last time you were in the woods and what’s the weirdest/funniest/best thing that happened to you there?”

    The last time I was in the woods was this past summer when I took my daughters on a small hike since my one daughter was 2 1/2 at the time (she just turned 3 about 2 weeks ago)
    Long story short there was 2 things that were funny,
    First being my 13 year encountered a bear and instead of being still and making noise, she took off running in the opposite direction screeching and screaming ” Oh My God, BBBBBEEEEAAARRR… DDDDAAADDD BEAR… Oh my God I am gonna die” …. The bear just stayed in place looked at my daughter, made some grunting noises and shook its head, it was likely the animal was saying “crazy city kids” … and then took off back in the woods..
    Second thing that happened was my toddler was afraid of tree because the way it looked…

    BeckeyWhiteATgmailDOTcom

    • fuonlyknew says:

      Two totally different problems there! You made need to have them watch some sweet nature shows before taking them back out there:)

      • Beckey says:

        Duely noted but we did have show of sorts before with a park ranger before we went hiking (National parks have these dos’ & don’ts as well as other informational shows)

  14. jaxgrampy says:

    Well, it’s been a while since I’ve been able to get out into the woods, but one time I’ll never forget. It was opening day of deer season. I was just kind of wandering around in an old clearing, already digging into my lunch by 7:30, munching on Oreos. Suddenly I realized a small spike buck was standing about 20 feet away, just watching me. I stopped moving and held out my Oreo, making little kissy sounds, talking real quiet to it. It actually started walking over to me, and with a little more encouragement it started eating the Oreo out of my hand! I couldn’t believe it, but there it was, eating my Oreo while I talked quietly to it. Then it occurred to me that probably wasn’t the smartest thing to be doing on opening day of deer season for EITHER of us, so I shooed it off into the woods and went the other way. I didn’t do much hunting after that experience. I did decide, though, that it must have been kept as a pet by somebody who found it as a new fawn, but brought it out to the woods and turned it loose once it got too big to handle. Wild deer just aren’t that stupid, to trust a human with or without a gun. But like I said, it was an experience I will never forget, and will always treasure.

  15. Stephanie says:

    Last time, we were in the high sierras and my mini munchkin puked all over my mom. I thought it was funny, she did too. The last time I was alone near shaver lake (documented bigfoot territory), I had a weird feeling I was being watched, when ‘finding bigfoot’ was on earlier this year, they were in the same area I was in, i saw the same landmarks. Maybe I was being watched by a bigfoot.

  16. Bj Bolich says:

    I was in the woods 2 blocks from my home recently. Heard crashing, thudding, running feet…froze, not sure what to do…had just decided to turn back when a 3-point buck charged past about 50 feet away. I love the woods, but I don’t love coming across fresh, steaming bear scat (and yes, I have).

    • fuonlyknew says:

      I love nature and cherish the brief encounters with the creatures of the forest. Except for maybe a skunk or a badger. Bears are a big no-no. I wouldn’t go back to that area!

  17. Ella says:

    Wow great comments! I really enjoyed reading everyones responses and now it makes me feel like nothing exciting ever happened to me in the wood hahaha
    I would say that last time I was in the woods was with few friends where we ended up making a bonfire and having few drinks. Long story short, we woke up in the morning not knowing where we were because of the drinks 😉

    • fuonlyknew says:

      I can’t tell everything that’s ever happened to me in the woods.lol
      I have had some truly scary things happen and some really wild things too.
      I grew up hanging out in the woods. Can’t really do that here. Too many poisonous snakes, gators and creepy crawlie bugs. Not to mention the giant, blood-sucking skeeters.

  18. Wow. These answers are great, folks. Keep’em coming! And I’m really appreciating the love and excitement for my work! Any author will tell you it’s what brings them back to the keyboard time and time again. {Big bear hugs to each of you!}

  19. […] A Hairy, Scary, Bizarre Giveaway (fuonlyknew.com) […]

  20. Lori Hayes says:

    Last time i was in the woods was with my sister in law in a place famous for spirit sightings, faires, etc…i decided we should go around midnight. As we walked thru the woods i was ahead of her and spotted a faire on the side of the path. I called for her to look,She caught a glimse . It was so cool. Next time i go i’ll be on the lookout for more faries. A little faire hunt.
    Lori529@comcast.net

    • fuonlyknew says:

      That would be kind of scary, walking in the wood at midnight! I’d be on the lookout for more than fairies! I’ve always wanted to see something magical in the woods:)

  21. Denise says:

    As a kid we use to play hide & seek in the dark in the woods behind our house. Trees seem to come alive & jump out in front of you! ;). I also saw the biggest snake ever curled up on the edge of the woods soaking in the sun. I don’t like snakes.

  22. A few years ago my friends and I went to this little cemetary in the middle of the night, all around the cemetary was woods. I am quite adventurous and decided to investigate a noise I heard behind one of the large graves and where was that – in the woods! lol

    Well, as I walked a few steps I listened and heard what I thought were whispers. I kept going and saw this see-through blonde woman just appear in front of me. She was sad and young and she pulled at my heart. We said a prayer before we left the woods/cemetary but unfortunately she followed me home. She isnt a bad ghostie but she does like a lil mischief and cartoons – if I turn the channel she pushes my bed around. So I turn it back until the show is over and then she is fine. I know! ODD!! :o)

    emilymarie070750@gmail.com

  23. […] A Hairy, Scary, Bizarre Giveaway (fuonlyknew.com) […]

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